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4.29.2004

Some Hog Stuff

 - Brian


70% of the waste you see on this website is information about this website. I think it's getting old fast...Really stinkin fast, so I'm going to give out upcoming stuff:

There are many different segments on this blog such as Contemplating Reality, Hog News, Dipshnit emails, and others I can't think of right now. A new feature will be added to Blog Hogger and it's called "Hog Hole News." Hog Hole News is where I force Joe to find interesting real-life stories and email them to me. Then, I will post them on Blog Hogger. Also, I just might add stupid, made-up, fake news stories and let you figure it out.

I will also add an award (The Blog Hogger Dope Award) for stupid numskulled individuals who's mental capacity is severely diminished due to drug abuse who decide to make nasty comments on our blog. I know what you're thinking, "You stupid idiot, Brian! Don't you know that giving attention to them is what the want?! Go do the world a favor and go jump off the Golden Gate Bridge and rid us of your dumbness!"
Well, I think it would add some humor to this dull place.

Upcoming pages will include, "Blog Hogger Goes Political", "Reader Emails", "Dipsnit Emails", and "The Best Of Blog Hogger."


"The Best of Blog Hogger???" I know, we're just a bunch of self-absorbed jerks...so what?!

That's all for ever, so seeyu.


...read "Some Hog Stuff"...

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4.27.2004

Oh The FIC Won't Let Us Be...

 - Brian


Have any of you jokers heard the latest news? An international government commission known as the Federal Internet Commission (FIC) has issued a new rule:
“Any weblog/websites that has any inappropriate material (without a license) will be either taken off the internet OR fined.”

Aint that just a bunch of cat crap…oops. I wonder if that’s inappropriate? I seriously hope they give the specifics for this new “rule” they have issued. Speaking of “inappropriate material”, I’ve recently received an email from a woman who is offended by Professor Dipshnit’s emails and his last name. This is the only thing I’ve got to say to this uptight disaster: “WHAT THE HECK IS YOUR STINKIN’ PROBLEM, LADY? HAVEN’T YOU EVER HEARD OF AN INNOCENT JOKE BEFORE?!?” Alright, I think I got THAT out of my system for now(a little harsh, though).
Well, if you’re wondering, here’s the email this person has sent me (I have not changed a thing):




Web Master,


I was deeply offended by the offensive emails that you have brainlessly put on your blog. I am a young mother of 2 and I am appalled that you call youself a Christian. My 14-year-old son has been reading the garbage you post on your website. He has printed out the “Dipshmit emails” and has shown them to his little friends. Once I took a look at the Dipshnit emails, I was in utter shock. For one thing, I seriously doubt that there is such a person with the last name, “Dipshnit”. Also, I find it very crude of you to add to your site a person with the name “Dipshnit”. I do believe you know what “Dipshnit” sounds like, don’t you? A VERY NASTY INAPPROPRIATE WORD that should not be used by any Christian person.

I find the material on your website to be generally clean, but do me a favor, please clean up your language.

Barbara Spritel

(please keep my last name confidential)l



There you go. I purposely gave out her last name just to be a jerk. Alright, back to the FIC thing. I understand that some internet material is pretty dirty, but do you really need a license to use profanity? I think that’s being a little too sensitive…don’t you think? If you have not heard yet, a lot of people are trying to get Howard Stern (a perverted radio talk show host) off the radio. I can understand trying to get a nasty, perverted talk show host off the radio, but trying to clean up the INTERNET is just stupid. There’s a big difference between national radio and the World Wide Web!


That’s all the ranting I’m gonna do for today, so remember, we're all in this together (no kidding)!



...read "Oh The FIC Won't Let Us Be..."...

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In the editing stages

 - Brian


Right now, I've just completed the interview with Connie Fareway (an author) and every thing is going *OKAY*. The interview is in it's editing stages...meaning I have to translate chat code(I interviewed her in a private chat) to readable English.

Well, anyway, that's all for right now!


...read "In the editing stages"...

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4.24.2004

That's it, I'm suing!!

 - Brian


Dig this: On Meta Filter, underneath the Meta Filter name, it says, "We're all in this together." Sounds familiar, huh?

The following is Brian going completely nuts:

AHHHHGGG!!! THEY STOLE IT FROM ME!! THOSE DIRTY LITTLE CHEATERS!!

If you have not noticed, underneath the Blog Hogger title, it says "We're all in this together," but I did it first. The last time I checked the Meta Filter subtitle, it said, "More adictive then crack."

How's that for plagiarism, eh? Kinda makes you wanna...well... you know, cry.


...read "That's it, I'm suing!!"...

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4.23.2004

BLOG HOGGER EXCLUSIVE: THE BLOG HOGGER OFFICIAL QUIZ

 - Joe


Welcome to the Blog Hogger Official Quiz! Brian and I are done asking the poor citizens of Broken Whisle Washington our pathetic questions.
Here are the results:


1. What's the 51st state of the U.S?
right: 1
wrong:6


2. There's 3 fields. In each field there are 5 haystacks. How many haystacks will there be if they are all combined?
right:2
wrong:5


3. A farmer had 17 sheep. All but 9 died. How many were left?
right:1
wrong:5


4. A plane carrying a mixture of Mexican and U.S citizens crashed on the border between the U.S and Mexico. Where were the survivors buried?
right:3
wrong:3


5. How many of each animal did Moses take on the ark?
right:1
wrong:6




That pretty much wraps it up then. All I have to say is that it was a fun thing to do.


...read "BLOG HOGGER EXCLUSIVE: THE BLOG HOGGER OFFICIAL QUIZ"...

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The Blog Hogger Official Quiz: In the making

 - Brian

Sup. At this second, Joe, Justin(little bro), Mary(joe's sister) and I are at the Pacific Science Center. We are are currently stoping people and asking them a bunch of trick questions. After we are done, I will post the results...

So far, it's been pretty good.


I'll keep you updated

>>>brian signing off

...read "The Blog Hogger Official Quiz: In the making "...

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4.19.2004

Contemplating Reality

 - Brian


Why don't eggs taste like chicken when every thing else does?


...read "Contemplating Reality"...

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Hog News

 - Brian


Sup. Time for a little news:


Joe and I are currently trying to interview a not so well known author against home schooling, named, Connie Fareway.
Also, expect more "Contents" pages on the side bar. Speaking of side bars, can ant of you folks *see* the side bar?
By the way, for various reasons, Joe will not be able to post for about a month........soooo that means you will be stuck here reading my junk.

that's all.



...read "Hog News"...

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4.17.2004

Oh, C.R.U.D!

 - Brian


Greetings friends and enemies, today I will be sharing an email I got from my good friend, Professor Richard Dipshnit. Dipshnit is a pet psychologist who has written many books, such as “Knee Deep In Dipshnit”, “Inside the Mind of an Animal”, and “Animals And Retards: What’s the Difference?”. Well, anyway, in
this email, he talks about an organization he has recently formed named, “Cats Really Understand Dialogue” AKA “C.R.U.D”. Yes, I too realize that Dipshnit goes *WAY* out of his *way* to offend people, but still, I think it is necessary to post his emails so that the world knows what kinds of people there are out there.

Here it is:




Brian,



I have recently formed an organization known as Cats Really Understand Dialogue A.K.A, C.R.U.D. Now, C.R.U.D is all about trying to prove that cats are super intelligent being bent on taking over the world and ruling it with an “iron paw”, so to speak.

C.R.U.D needs all the support it can gain from ordinary people who also believe that cats are as intelligent as humans in this world (like myself). So far, we have not gained much support from local and political people. Every time I make a public speech (representing C.R.U.D), I am booed out of town with in the first 5 minutes of my talk. I find this very demoralizing and depressing. Some times I just feel like I want to…well, hurt an animal. I’m not a violent person, but sometimes depression does that to me.
In previous letters, I have brought up the subject of dogs plotting against mankind, but I’ve thought about that scenario and have come to relies that that is a little far-fetched. Using the process of elimination, I have determined that cats are the only animal most likely to take over the world. If you take some time to look at an ordinary house cat, you will notice the calm, intelligent look on their face, suggests that they are plotting something…well…a little evil. Now you may think I’m some sort of nut, but when you think about it, cats are a little more specious that dogs.
Wait a minute, that’s what they want you to think! DOGS AND CATS ARE WORKING TOGETHER!! Why didn’t I think of that before? I just now thought up a new theory: what if cats look suspicious just to draw attention away from dogs so that DOGS CAN TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!! How could I have been so blind?

This has inspired me to start on a new book titled, “The Dog and Cat Conspiracy”.

Dipshnit



“The Dog and Cat Conspiracy”? That’s just wrong.
You know, I’m still trying to figure out why I even post these dumb emails. They seem so corny. Well, I think that’s the last time I post a Dipshnit email, that’s for sure!


...read "Oh, C.R.U.D!"...

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4.12.2004

Dipshnit is coming to town

 - Brian


This week, I'll be posting an email I recently recieved from Dipshnit. For a number of reasons, I will not have the chance to do it tonight.


That's all.


oh, wait a minute! Don't forget to tell me what you did for Easter!


>>>Brian signing off


...read "Dipshnit is coming to town"...

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SORRY SORRY.........

 - Brian

My template got all screwed up, so I had to create another...i hope it looks like the last one.

...read "SORRY SORRY........."...

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4.11.2004

He has risen...

 - Brian


...He has truly risen!


Happy Easter


...read "He has risen..."...

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4.04.2004

hello it's the prodigal son and he's Finally returned....

 - Ivan

Well I have returned (that is for a few seconds). Peace, push out the love and bring in the drive. I just made this awesome comic with stupid old Brian here. I'll give you few seconds to guess what the @#$@ title is. 9.............8.................834............7...........3.............9..............2................124865836583465867..............554..........1. Well it seems that your time is up. The title is SNOOP AND FRIENDS it's a little on the gory side but all well. It truly is a work of "ART". I'll give you an idea of what it's about: SNOOP DOG, a GATLING GUN, and,(last but not least) MICHAEL JACKSON, and his/her half sister DORA THE EXPLORER. I might be able to give you guys a preview SO STOP DROOLING!!!!!!!! nice HUH??? @#@$#@@@%@#@#$*#$&&^ I'm good lol.

...read "hello it's the prodigal son and he's Finally returned.... "...

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4.02.2004



She's still a dope

...read ""...

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Check this out...

 - Brian


I found this blog in the "Recent Posts" section of Blogger.com.


I find this blog really interesting because it's done by a former(?) U.S Marine. Check it out.

Also, look at his commenting system....pretty clever.


...read "Check this out..."...

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