Fashion sucks.

 - Brian

What the -? Is it now officially a national requirement to completely discard your individuality? Obviously -- at least that's what I've gathered from my fellow teenagers. It seems everyone now thinks it's cool to dress the same...for whatever reason. I blame it all on the stupid "Dress cool 4 back 2 school" garbage that clothing companies are trying to push. Man...

Anyway, I've concocted a list of fashion trends that thoroughly tick me off:

Anything Goth - First off, goths suck. They sit around all day cutting themselves and whining about the pain. They also write crappy poetry. Anyway, I'm sick and tired of seeing these goths pacing around with black lines painted all over their faces. Also, stop wearing striped pants. You look like freaks, and most of society rejects freaks (and they wonder why they’re rejected?).

Semi-goths - I have no idea what this style of dress is called. I'll describe it to you so that you have a general idea what I'm ranting about: Once in a while, you'll see these really tall guys walking around in short, black shirts, sparkly belts, and uber (I love that word) straight jeans. They also tend to wear glasses with funny looking frames...
Anyway, it looks retarded.

Flip-flops - Now listen, girls, I can understand wearing flip-flops to a beach on a hot summer day. But c'mon now, STOP WEARING THEM EVERY WHERE!!! I was forced to go to some local parade today, and about 60% of the girls were wearing flip-flops! And on top of that, it was like -15 degrees out there, seriously! Cut it out, it's not hot.

white-boy hip-hop - You're not black, so stop dressing like you are. I laugh every time I see these clowns waddling down the street (they waddle cuz' their pants are falling down). You don't even look street, you honestly look like clowns! You know, red shoes, overly baggy pants, huge vests, phony bling...etc. You're not Eminem, so pull up your pants, take off the doo rags, AND ACT NORMAL!

Glad that's out of my system! If you were angered by my criticism of your fashion, I'm sorry...oh wait, no I'm not.